Helga Goes to Anger Management
by OK Kitty
Summary: Helga/Arnold romance. When Arnold drags Helga to Anger Management class against her will, chaos ensues. Will Helga beat both Arnold and Mr. Simmons to a pulp or will she learn to control her anger and learn to love? R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**Helga Goes to Anger Management**

 **or The Seven Things I hate About You**

Song: Miley cyrus - 7 things I hate about you

Pairing: Helga/Arnold

Rating: T or M depends how the story goes

I need a beta for this story too!

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Helga _hated_ Arnold Shortman.

She hated his football head, she hated his stupid philanthropy and how nice he was to everybody. She hated that no matter how much she was mean to him, he refused to fight back or be mean to her too.

Most of all she hated that she didn't actually hate him at all.

She hated that she liked him. That no matter how she tried to forget about him or tried to genuinely hate him, she couldn't.

Helga Pataki hated that she sort of liked his stupid football head and green eyes.

Ugh, he was such a soppy idiot. Somebody needed to pound the naive moron.

oooo

Helga saw Arnold Shortman walking down the hallway of their high school and she scowled at him. Then seeing Lila in the distance behind him, trying to bat her eyelashes and get his attention, she ran towards him and pushed him.

"Move it, football head!" she screeched. "Don't you know you're supposed to watch where you're walking!"

Arnold, whom she had cornered against the lockers, playfully pushed her back gently on the shoulders and he smiled slyly. He had a wide white smile, which contrasted almost perfectly with his tan skin and semi-long blonde hair. Plus he had those annoyingly pretty green eyes. Helga, snap out of it and be mean to him! she thought.

Helga scowled, and Arnold smiled again. "Sorry Helga, I didn't see you there."

"Well you better have. Duh, stupid idiot."

Arnold cringed, his temper getting the better of him suddenly. "You know Helga, if you weren't so rude to me, perhaps we might get along," he said.

Helga felt furious. "Don't tell me how to behave or act! I'll be rude if I want to!" She shoved at his shoulder again. "You're just an annoying goody-goody football head!"

To her surprise, Arnold Shortman grabbed her hand, and with a surprising amount of force from a skinny nerd, restrained her.

"Let me go!" she shouted and tried to get her arm out of Arnold's hands.

"No Helga. I've had just about enough of your rudeness and brutality. You're a bully but I'm not going to just let you off on this. You also punched Brainy and Harold."

"They deserved it!" Helga shouted at the stupid nerd.

Arnold smiled slyly and twisted her arm. "Which is why, I've decided to enroll you in the Anger Management classes," he said.

"What?!" Helga's jaw dropped.

Arnold's smile widened. "Yeah, I heard Mr. Simmons has started a new extracurricular class for Anger Management and I wasn't going to say anything. But well, after you pushed and shoved me for no reason, I think it's a good idea if I enroll you!" He started to drag her down the hallway towards Mr. Simmons class.

"No! No! Are you crazy?!" Helga tried to get out of Arnold's grasp and run away. The last thing she wanted was to be within 100 yards of Mr. Simmon's or any of his kumbaya "feelings" feel-good lovey dovey garbage. But since they'd both gotten to 11th grade, Arnold had got a lot stronger than her. He was still skinny and nerdy, and a bit short for a guy, but he had some muscles and right now he was overpowering her.

He pulled her towards Mr. Simmons class and he gritted. "You're going Helga, it's for your own good."

Helga squinted her eyes and tried to decide between kicking him in the shins or yelling assault. "Arnold, I will kill you for this."

Arnold Shortman just smiled again and tapped at the classroom door. "Don't worry, one day you'll thank me."

Mr. Simmons immediately opened the door and smiled excitedly when he saw Helga and Arnold standing there.

"Mr. Simmons, Helga would like to be enrolled in your Anger Management class," Arnold said and smirked at her.

Helga looked so angry she looked like she wanted to tear his hair out but then Mr Simmons grabbed them all in a group hug and dragged them in.

"Come this way, kids, you're going to love this! We've just started handing out cookies and then we will get to the first part of the treatment: sharing circle and introducing ourselves."

Helga's eyes widened in panic. "No!"

But Arnold just dragged them both in the classroom and Mr. Simmons shut the door behind.

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Chapter 2: Arnold and Helga share "feelings" R&R iof you want more :) thanks


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks so much for reviewing and follow/favouriting, I'm so happy people want to read this :) I've got some anger issues like Helga Pataki, so I'm going to try to deal with them through this story...sort of like therapy! And ugh Mr. Simmons is just going to be a nightmare isn't he and make them sing kumbaya and hold hands in a circle lol XD *hopefully arnold won't be punched too many times by helga after it's all over*

if you have any suggestions or things you want to see in the story, including pairings, say so in the reviews and I'll do it! thanks and xxoxoxo

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Helga was eating cookies with a very, _very_ angry look on her face.

Somehow she had been sucker-punched into attending these stupid Anger Management classes with that dork Arnold and his even dorkier mentor Mr. Simmons.

Helga growled and cast a side-long glance at Arnold who was sitting beside her and still had a restrain on her right arm so she wouldn't escape.

"You see, you're having fun already," Arnold said and nudged her, tapping his annoying soft fingers against her wrist.

Helga smiled maniacally. "Oh, I'm having fun alright, Buster. I'm thinking of how many ways I'm going to knock you sideways once we get out this class." She scowled at him. "Criminey you are dead."

Arnold shifted uncomfortably, like he was genuinely not looking forward to that prospect.

"Uhh," Arnold scratched at his neck. "Well, hopefully, by the time we get out of this class, you won't have those anger issues anymore Helga."

"The class is 7 weeks," Mr. Simmons informed them as he passed around the class, humming merrily to himself, and setting up chairs in a circle.

Helga felt like she was going to have a panic attack. "Criminey seven weeks?!"

"Yes," Mr. Simmons said with a grating smile as he passed around some pens and crayons for the morons that signed up for this class. "And Arnold already got you to sign the attendance agreement so I'm afraid it's all set in stone now Helga and if you miss a class I will have to inform the principle."

"Are you kidding me?!" Helga spat. "I thought I was signing an attendance sheet, not some phoney baloney attendance agreement to sign over my soul to the dev-" Mr. Simmons squared her a look -"I mean, sign up for this tootin falootin totally fabulous class!" she finished sarcastically.

"That's better," Mr. Simmon's said dryly, "Now could you pass these along Arnold?" he passed the football head some sheets to handout. "Oh and get the cookies from Helga too, please and thank you!" Mr. Simmons said brightly.

Helga suddenly felt something try to grab something from her lap and she turned with a scowl to the offending trespasser with his hand near her thigh. She clenched her jaw, preparing to pound him.

"Calm down, Helga, I'm just trying to take the cookie jar from you." Arnold smiled and she looked down, realizing she was indeed hogging the cookie jar in her lap. "We're supposed to be passing them around." Arnold lifted his brow and his annoyingly kind smile was plastered on his face again. "You know sharing, Helga? You might have heard of it?"

Helga growled and held tightly onto the cookie jar for a moment. If they weren't in class where everybody was watching, she'd already have pounded the bugger. First for signing up for this class and tricking her into signing some attendance agreement. And then for totally invading her personal space by grabbing her wrist and then totally snatching a feel of her lap when he grabbed the cookie jar.

She squared one of her thick black eyebrows at Arnold; the Shortman was turning out a lot sneakier than she had took him to be. But then high school had changed them all and maybe this was part of his new plan to be the most smug annoying helpful sophomore around.

She shoved the cookie jar into his chest. So hard that the glass jar probably bruised his chest and made Arnold cough. Then she smirked. "If you wanted to cop a feel, you could've just asked Arnie instead of coming up with some lame excuse of snatching cookies! Criminey what a pervert!" she said loudly so everybody could hear. At least several other students looked in confusion towards them.

Anrold turned bright red "I didn't-" he stammered. "I mean I'm sorry if I -" he coughed again, perhaps from the damage she had caused to his lungs by smashing the jar into his chest "I'm sorry if I did accidentally."

"Oh _accidentally,_ perfect what a brilliant excuse! No wonder you're a top student and head of the math league," Helga mocked his voice and rolled her eyes. She was actually enjoying torturing him like this. _A little._

"Well, I'm sorry," Arnold said again, the blush dying down on his cheeks, as his familiar smile returned to his face.

"Whatever," Helga crossed her arms and refused to look at him.

Arnold started passing around the cookies and handouts awkwardly, looking back at her every few minutes, as fif worried she was going to tackle him to the ground from behind.

Actually, he wasn't far off mistaken. With his back turned, Helga really was mentally debating with herself whether it was worth the trip to the Principle's office (and phone call to their parents) to tackle the football head to the ground.

Think of it as personal touch down football, Helga grinned to herself. Why oh why did I never join the football varsity team? I could've easily touched down with how much practice I had over the years pushing around football head!

She laughed to herself at her own joke.

Suddenly Mr. Simmons appeared, almost instantaneously by her side and made her jump out of her skin a little. He had that blandly generic and irritatingly cheerful smile on his face. "Care to share something with the class, Helga?" Mr. Simmons simpered and passed her a box of crayons.

Helga looked at the box of crayons dubiously and wondered if Mr. Simmons had lost his mind a little and that is why he had decided to switch to teaching H.S. special ed and extracurricular classes like this monstrosity.

"Err no...I was just laughing at... _something_." She darted an angry look at Arnold and he turned away shiftily.

Mr. Simmons smiled. "Well since you seem to be in such a good mood and laughing, Helga, which is a brilliant start to a shiny new day! You can be first in our Sharing Circle," he said with nausaeating emphasis.

Helga started to have a panic attack.

"Err..no thanks?" Helga gulped and looked around at the class staring at her. There were like 8 people, plus her and Arnold, in the class now. She panicked when she saw Harold was there too.

But then she felt Arnold sit down beside her and she calmed a little.

"It's alright Helga," Arnold said quietly so only she could hear. "We're trying to help you."

Helga clenched her fists into balls and turned to him. "Arnold if you want to help me," she spat "Why don't you go first in the Sharing Circle? Since you clearly like it so much!" She handed him the Sharing Circle handout sheet which included such stupid embarassing questions like: what is your first memory? what do you like to do at night? and other retarded questions.

Mr. Simons laughed and pulled up a chair so the his artsy fartsy ass was sitting right beside her and Arnold. "Fine, we'll start with both of you! I can tell there's a lot of feelings between these two close friends that they need to resolve!"

"Close friends, yeah right," Helga snorted. "More like worse nightmare."

She thought for a second that Arnold's eyes seemed hurt, but no that couldn't be right. Arnold didn't care about her. He was always cared about Lila and the other goody-goody girls.

"Alright, let's start the Sharing Circle! Arnold you go first and ask Helga some questions from the sheet!"

Arnold winked at her and she felt her throat tighten. Oh no what was he going to ask her?

,

,

,

Yeah! Sharing Circle next! Do you have any questions you want to put on the Sharing Circle Question Sheet? It's like one of those dorky "Introduce Yourself" quizzes but even dorkier. What do you think Arnold should ask her?

would love to hear your suggestions!


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